The 5th annual MommyFest has begun! Head on over, ladies, and check out the schedule of events as well as the various contests going on and the freebies!

This is such a fun event - I hope you’ll enjoy it!

Finding Flabuless, in conjunction with Lipton Diet White Tea and Flabuless’s new website DownsizeTV are having a great contest to win a super-cool Lipton branded Fuji Crosstown 2.0 bike!

I could totally use this bike!

If you could use it then you should enter too!

Internet Cafe Devotions has started a new Saturday MeMe called “Cafe Chat” that I thought I would participate in. I hope you will check it out and maybe be a part of it yourselves.

This week the question to chat about is “What is the greatest lesson you learned from your mother or a mom like figure in your life?”

The greatest lesson I learned from my Mom was that no matter what happens in life I am not “just a mom”. My Mom was a stay-at-home mom for quite some time when I was younger and as my brother and I got older she joined back into the work force. Even as a stay-at-home mom she always had activities and things that were her own. When she went back to work that was her own too - her thing for her to do. She always took care of us kids, but she always remained her own person.

I think that too often these days stay-at-home moms get caught in the trap of being “just a mom” and they forget that they are people too with desires, wishes, hopes and dreams. I know that for a while I started fall into that place where everything was about being a mom and nothing was about me as a person. My Mom helped me to realize that I can still be a person, me, myself, and be a good mother to my children - both are possible. Keeping that sense of self is possible and it is necessary - it builds up self-esteem, confidence, and it makes you feel human. That is one reason why I blog so much. Blogging is my way of doing something for me and it involves one of my favorite things (passions, if you will) which is writing. I love to write and it brings me focus and a calmness that I need after spending my days being super-mom.

So, I’m not “just a mom” - I am a woman with dreams, goals, hopes, and more. Thank you, Mom, for making sure I knew that and for making sure to remind me every so often. I love you.

This is a great recipe for times when a mom has a late night at work and doesn’t have the time for some complicated meal, or when we stay-homers have a trip to the store that’s a little bit longer than expected or have just had a rough day and don’t really feel like putting forth much effort but still make something good…

Chicken Taco Rice

2 large cans chicken breast
2 cans chicken broth or 2 T chicken bouillon
2 cans Mexican style Rotel
2 cans black beans, drained and rinsed
1 can corn, drained
1 chopped onion or dried onion flakes
1 packet taco seasoning
Rice*
Cilantro** (optional)
Sour cream (optional)
Cheese (optional)

Add all ingredients except rice to a huge pot and bring to a boil. I usually add enough rice to fill up whatever cans had liquid in it or equal to the amount of water I used. If it comes out dry, you can always add salsa and act like it was on purpose. (LOL) Remove from heat and let it set for 5-10 minutes. Serve topped with cheddar cheese and sour cream. You can even roll it up in a tortilla and eat it like a burrito. Expect leftovers for days.

Of course you can add jalapenos or red pepper to give it a little kick. I’ve also added some frozen stir-fry veggies before and that’s really good too. If you add the peppers, you can sub fajita seasoning for taco seasoning and it becomes “Chicken Fajita Rice.”

*Instead of using regular white rice, you can also use 2-3 (or more, whatever) packets of Spanish rice. It tastes just as good and adds more seasoning.

**I use fresh cilantro if I can, but if you use fresh, you’ll use way less than if you use dried because it’s a lot stronger.

Thanks to Burg over at Sweet Insanity for this super-yummy recipe!

Sometimes kids can say something that just melts your heart. Take, for instance, my son who has been trying so hard to learn that using the potty is the best thing to do at his age. This is a long, hard road and on so many days I just think I will give up. It is usually on those days that he reminds me of just why I keep trudging on…

B: Mommy, I need to go potty.

Me: Great! Let’s go!

B: Mommy, I need to pee.

Me: Awesome, dude!

And so we went and he went - just like a big boy.

Me: I am so proud of you! You’re such a big boy!

A little while later I needed to go myself. So I got up…

B: Mommy, where are you going?

Me: I gotta go potty, I’ll be right back.

B: Yay, Mommy! I’m so proud of you!

And then he gave me a big hug and said, “You’re a big girl now!”

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!! Ya gotta love that!!!

Dr. Phil always talks about how you have to find a child’s “currency” in order to discipline them. What he means is that you have to find what motivates the kid. For example, if they are motivated by video games then you can use taking away those games for discipline - that is their currency.

I think he is absolutely right - all kids have currency.

Time outs used to work very well with my son, but he has gotten into a stage where they just don’t faze him anymore. At first I was completely annoyed by this, but then I discovered his currency. He loves his computer games and he also loves his cartoons - if he is acting up I can take either of those away and get his attention really fast.

My daughter is attached at the hip right now and can’t seem to stand being away from me for even a second so her currency is time with Mommy. Time outs are very effective with her.

It will be interesting as my kids get older to see just how often their currency changes and to discover what it is that motivates them. I am wondering, for you moms with older kids who have moved on from the time out stage, what is the currency in your house?

I was once talking with a lady who told me she couldn’t stand the phrase “train up a child”. She said that “children are not dogs and we don’t train them we raise them.” Well, I could see her point in that they aren’t dogs, but I disagreed with her because we do in fact train them.

Children are like little sponges and they absorb everything that goes on around them. It is because of this absorption that we have to train them in how to behave. If we don’t teach them (train, teach, it is all the same) then we can expect that they will behave like little monsters. Unlike the gal I was speaking to, I do not have a problem with the phrase “train up a child” - frankly, it is all semantics anyway.

So, this brings me to behavior issues - people who aren’t training their children and whose children behave like complete terrors. I was at a toddler class yesterday with my daughter (we go every Monday) and the usual crowd was there. A few weeks ago a new mom started coming with her son. She is nice enough, but her son is a brat. I don’t say that lightly. I wouldn’t want someone calling my kid a brat, but he son takes first prize in that category. He is constantly taking toys away from other children, pushing them out of his way, and when it is time for our story and parachute play he runs around screaming and jumping up and down doing everything possible to disrupt the rest of the kids. Now I know that kids in the age range of 1-3 (which is what our group is) can be rambunctious and full of energy, but there comes a time when a child is just out of control and needs a little discipline. His mom does nothing. Apparently she has never heard of training her child. As her son pushed my daughter off of the ladder on the slide she smiled and laughed. As he grabbed toys away from other kids thus sending them off in tears she sat there and smiled and laughed. And during story time he began jumping around and yelling and at one point even knocked the little felt person off the felt board and his mom just ran after him laughing like it was all a game - finally our class leader did something she normally doesn’t do and she took it upon herself to discipline the lady’s kid. This, of course, put the boy in tears. Can you guess what his mom did? She smiled, hugged, cuddled, and apologized to him for HIS bad behavior!

*shake head, roll eyes, and everything else here*

Seriously, I wanted to call Nanny Jo!

So, this brings me back to training up our children. Children need discipline. They need to be taught how to behave. We can’t just expect to give them free reign and have everything be ok - it doesn’t work that way. There needs to be consequences for bad behavior - there needs to be punishment. It can be time out, taking away a privilege, or anything else that works, but it needs to be done! And after it is done, ladies, we don’t then turn and apologize to the kid for it - that does not work! And if it has gotten so bad that someone else has to discipline your kid then it is time for you to do a serious reality check and then get your butt in gear because parenting starts at home - in fact, if you go look in the mirror it starts right there.